Ghosts

July 27, 2022

The days creep by like ghosts. Thin and fleeting, it´s hard to get hold of them. Dani, Mascha's little son, is with us right now. His mother has found a job. She washes dishes in an Asian restaurant. So she can do that, Jin has agreed to look after Dani in the meantime. He is a shy little boy with sad, black eyes. At first he just sat in the corner waiting to be picked up again. Doesn't speak a word of German after all. But for some reason he likes Leo. The two are sitting on the kitchen floor playing with marbles. Meanwhile, Jin and Till are debating whether children should be taught gender-sensitive language from an early age.

All of this flies by me like in a fog. The nightmares are actually gone. My nights are long and black. But I'm still not really on top of things. It feels a bit like I'm just a silent observer of my own life. As if none of this had anything to do with me. Do you know this feeling? Sometimes I have it, but rarely as strongly as now.